Nostalgia

Rather strange experience in One Stop. Oliver, the rotund American shop assistant stopped me from buying a DVD. 'You can get five of those for that price at HMV'. Hmm, nothing like a loyal employee

'Oh, I know Oliver,' Doug said later when I went to visit him. 'An American who can't stand America. Calls me 'Squire', you know. I tell him I haven't got any land, any money, anything associated with the title: 'Esquire'.'

He told me about an old lady he visits who lives above him - Dot (my mother's namesake). She is ninety-eight but still clinging to life. She is fully compus-mentis but her body is falling apart bit by bit. She is going blind, she cannot rise from her chair, she cannot use the lavatory by herself.

I would prefer the reverse - that my brain would be the first to go. I would prefer to retreat into childhood, absolved of all responsibilities.

I think Doug finds her somewhat demanding. He becomes exasperated with her constant complaints about modern life: 'It's a funny old world. Life was so much better when I was a girl (Well, of course it was, for you), the world was so much better when I was a girl.'

'Nonsense,' Doug scoffed. 'Imagine this - if you'd been in this position back in the '30s,unable to move, unable to take care of yourself. All those years ago you'd have been on the scrap heap. You certainly wouldn't have the benefits you have now. You certainly wouldn't have a team of carers coming in three times a day to give you meals and put you to bed. You certainly wouldn't be permitted to stay in this flat. They'd force you into a nursing home.'

Nostalgia breeds views through rose-tinted glasses.