Saturday, November 12, 2005

A Depressing Entry

The narrative of my life has been disrupted more times than I care to remember. When I was seventeen I was headed for R.A.D.A. I was participating in youth theatre. I played the eponymous protagonist in Antigone and Ophelia in Hamlet but those two characters were close to own personality. I was not a good all-round actress because I could not transcend myself. Now I am all over the place: I am a freelance writer, proofreader and careers advisor. How much futher from my original ambitions can I get? What does one do if one's life does not proceed according to plan? At the moment I can only think in fragments and all around me everything is crumbling - father is dying, L has some kind of lung disease and may have to take steroids and girls on an internet forum I frequent are starving themselves. I keep telling them that what they do to their bodies now determines their future state of health. Osteoporosis is not pretty.

People don't see you for what you could have been, they see you for what you are.


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